The Mess

Please start by reading "my oil history" 4 articles below, as an introduction to this series.

Picture was taken from BP website '© BP p.l.c.

Remember I said in the “Love and Loss” post that in no way was I defending anyone associated with this disaster? I’m not, I’m as much for protecting our planet as anyone but to help you understand what happened, I am going to reprint a very brief summary of what an engineer wrote on a technical site to a novice to the industry. The author is an oilfield worker with a great deal of experience behind him. It is simply his assessment and in no way tells the whole story. I am posting it because it may help you understand how much the average “joe” does not know about all this and how very complicated the process of drilling for oil is.

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He writes this by telling me that above all else this goes along with a very BIG IF:

IF we have a accurate picture of how the incident began then this would be a partial explanation: they had run production casing from total depth back up to the well head/BOP. Cement was pumped down the drill pipe to the bottom of this casing and forced back up between the casing and the rock. The reason for this cement job is to isolate the oil reservoir. This cement seal would be the only barrier preventing the well from “coming in “ (flowing oil/NG up the casing). Prior to pumping the cement the weight of the drilling mud kept the reservoir from flowing up. The backpressure stopping the flow was a result of an 18,000’ column of heavy drilling mud.

Following regulations BP was required for safety reason to set a series of cement plugs in the production casing to ensure the reservoir would not leak to the surface until they were ready to produce the well. To make the eventual re-entry of the well easier BP “displaced” the riser (that 20” tube that connected the well head/BOP to the drilling rig on the surface of the GOM) with seawater and thus removing the heavy drill mud from the well. But the did this before setting the top cement plug which would have kept any oil/NG from flowing up should the casing or cement fail. This is why testing the validity of the cement job was extremely critical: the column of seawater could not produce a sufficient backpressure to prevent the oil/NG from rushing to the surface. If the cement didn’t hold there was a 100% possibility of the well coming in.

There is a standard procedure for determining if a well is flowing. The same protocol is followed for a cased hole as well when drilling. I don’t know for a fact but I wouldn’t be surprised if this procedure had been done more than 100 times as this well was being drilled. The mud pumps on the rig push drilling mud down the drill pipe, which then returns to the surface between the drill pipe and the casing or open hole. Though this will sound simplistic this is the primary method to tell if a well is kicking (flowing): you shut the mud pumps off. For oil/NG to flow to the surface it has to push the mud out of the hole ahead of it. If you turn the pumps off and the mud stops flowing out you have a static well. If the mud continues flowing out the return line the well is coming in and a blow out is on the way unless you stop this flow. In addition to visually seeing the mud flowing out, there are various mud tanks that have the mud flow volume measured automatically.

Again, IF we have the correct story, the mud returns were not being monitored. We do not know why. Why the cement failed is a separate issue from not monitoring the mud returns. Had they seen the mud flowing they could have shut the well in (closed all the return valves on the rig). The oil/NG might have still flowed all the way up but it would have not escaped to the drill floor and exploded. Killing a shut in well is a standard procedure and practiced often. Once the well was shut in they could have replaced the light seawater with heavy drilling mud via the drill pipe and stopped the flow of oil/NG from the reservoir. But they did not become aware of the well coming in until it as too late.

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All of this to inform you that there were a lot of problems that the American public was not aware of.

I believe the fault lies in the fact that even though the oil industry has made great strides with the technology to drill safer, deeper, faster and cleaner, they have made very few improvements in designing equipment that will work in the worst of situations to handle problems such as we’re seeing now. Add in human error and you have this.

Desperation brings new innovations. In the post below I stated a few good things that could come from this tragedy. One of those would be how to prevent something like this from happening again.

However; regardless of how many new regulations are put in place, regardless of how much new technology and equipment is developed, you still have “man” in charge……

And as long as the population depends on oil & gas to operate our world we’re going to have situations like this. Everyone must accept part of the blame because we use the product and cry for more, then complain if it’s dirty when we spill it.

Update as of 6/01/10, notation from "the oil drum"........

"All of these operations, including the cutting of the riser, are complex, involve risks and uncertainties, and have to be carried out by ROVs at 5,000 feet under water. Systems such as the LMRP containment cap have never before been deployed at these depths and conditions, and their efficiency and ability to contain the oil and gas cannot be assured. It is currently anticipated that attachment of the LMRP cap will be attempted later this week; however, operational delays could impact anticipated timeframes.
Preparations to use the Discoverer Enterprise to deploy the LMRP cap and the intended severing of the damaged riser mean that the riser insertion tube tool, previously deployed, will not be reinserted into the main leak at the end of the riser."

Hope

PLEASE READ PREVIOUS ENTRY "MY OIL HISTORY", FOLLOWED BY "LOVE & LOSS" Before reading this post.

Pictures and figures taken from the BP website.....'© BP p.l.c.

Response in Numbers

22,000 personnel deployed

1,600 vessels on site

3.7 million feet of boom deployed

321,000 barrels of oil-related water mix recovered

17 staging areas set-up to protect shoreline

30,000 claims filed, 15,000 already paid

http://www.theoildrum.com

http://www.bp.com

From day of the explosion of the BP transocean rig, when the “news” was reporting President Obama should have been out there at that moment, to one of the latest ideas of using a nuke to blow it all up, there have been hundreds of very stupid statements made. Some innocently due to simply not knowing any different, to some very rude and hateful comments made that has done no one any good at all.

First of all it took at a minimum of 3 days to handle the initial explosion with fire and emergency rescue efforts. When a disaster happens on a drilling rig, ONLY experienced professional industry personnel are allowed near it, and that is totally for safety sake. There is no way anyone NOT associated with BP or the rescue folks could be allowed on site. The main concern was to get a count on those killed and those still alive… this included transporting 126 off of the rig and out of the water as fast as possible, including those injured, not easily done when forced to use boats and helicopters in getting all of them back to land. The next large concern was getting the fire out and assessing the damage…. Time had to be taken to find out what they were dealing with, and preventing further danger to the people involved who had to go a mile under to assess the situation after the remnants of the rig sank. With the ensuing pressure coming from the free flowing gusher, this was not as easy as it sounds. It would be similar to placing a cap on a volcano. Then came the task of many practical matters such as allowing structures to settle, and lowering lights so they could even see what to do first. It is black and dark one mile under the surface of the water. Oil and natural gas is spewing outward and upward at alarming pressures.

If you don’t know by now, the same day the accident happened, our government was on the job in Washington DC, gathering information and getting a plan in place to help with what and where it could.

Why couldn’t it just be turned off or capped immediately? To put this in as simple of terms as possible, you cannot imagine the pressure they are dealing with, not to mention currents, twisted equipment and pipes laying on top of each other and the areas they needed access to. It has taken weeks to even get to the point where they could begin to actually think about what “could” be done to stop the flow.

Why did it happen? There are a few various theory’s and the final answer probably will not be found for years….. There is no doubt it was a combination of human error, and equipment failure. I will not question it for now……

In our “instant satisfaction, all for me society” it is understandable that we want answers and we want them now and we want this fixed immediately! Well, I really am sorry but it’s not going to happen that way.

There have been suggestions of sinking a sub or battleship on top of the mess to stop it, there have been suggestions of shooting fishing weights or bb’s down the hole to compress it, and one of the most ridiculous was to blow it up with a nuclear bomb…. Also to use a giant screw, and the best one yet, filling it full of oil eating worms…. Oh yes, and calling out the entire Navy that first week. Can’t you see it now with thousands of ships out there running into each other, every one of 10,000 people not knowing what each other is doing? It would have been only another disaster in the making……

Ignoring the suggestions they know will NOT work, there are hundreds trying to come up with ideas that WILL work. Trust is hard to come by but oilfield people have the best chance with even a slight possibility of getting the answers, and they are working day and night to come up with a way. That is not to say there is not other intelligent people working on it, great minds from all corners of the world are trying to figure it out.

They know for sure the probably only and for sure the best way to stop this is by drilling a relief well…. That IS going to take time, (approximately two months). In the meantime, attempt after attempt using various, practical ideas are being tried, none of them with any guarantee. Each of us set by helplessly wishing it would just stop. They know that with every passing moment millions of gallons more of oil is escaping to ruin our lands and no one wants it stopped worse than those who are directly involved and have to accept the blame. With each failure the public is becoming more and more restless, spewing more and more hatred, and only further damaging the efforts thru wasting time criticizing while not having any better ideas of there own, and those who do not understand the complexities of it or respecting the ones who are trying to solve the problem.

One rumor that needs to stop being repeated, No BP is not going to produce this well just to make money from it. This well is gone, done and over with, end of story. In years to come the area, zones and the central location may produce a controllable well, but it won’t be this one, so if you think they’re only trying to capture the spewing oil or gas you are totally misinformed. If they CAN capture enough oil to realize a profit from, they will have enough debt for clean up operations there won’t be any going into any executive’s pocket.

Being the forever optimist, (even on bad days) I am choosing to find some good things about this whole episode.

Finally, the American public will learn some things about what allows their lifestyle. It has always been a contention of mine that very few people have ever taken time to learn about the oil industry from the time the first Drake well was drilled to how it’s grown in technology over the past 141 years. The very industry that provides the life style we’ve become accustomed to…..warmth, shelter, water, transportation, and the hundreds of items associated with those necessities. From plastics to lubricants, and from clothes to tires, we have what we need and want due to the efforts of the oil industry. This cannot come to an end until we find a different method of providing those things from a different source.

This may be what will at last bring us an answer to that. We have already developed some methods thru solar, wind, biofuels, etc…. but that is not enough and they are not the whole answer. Hopefully the great minds of the world will find something sooner rather than later….

This could be the answer to “peak oil”… Since it’s been stated by many more apt than I, we are running out. Is there a possibility that they have tapped into a source that will provide enough of it so we won’t have to worry about running out in the next few critical years until we find a better solution? Probably not but it's a nice thought.

I read a statistic the other day that said the amount of oil gushing from this well is only 3% of what the United States uses in one day.

New technology could be discovered as a result of this accident. Some processes that have never been tried before are being completed. Already they are working with applications that are new at these depths…..

Tighter regulations are already being put into place. If you’re unsure of some of the regulations an oil field company or related company must fail, just ask….. It’s nearly impossible to get a permit or contract now, after this it will take more than any of us and only a select few in the industry has the resources to provide.

An appreciation of our amazing earth must be taken into account and give us hope we all need right now. I can take you to places where in the early days and of times not that long ago where oil was spilled and the land was blemished and you would not know unless I told you that an oil well or rig was ever there. Our earth has an ability to heal itself that is beyond our understanding.

I hope this series of posts will give a little hope to some of you who are terribly upset right now and full of fear over how this is being handled. It is very sad and it’s a horrible disaster and black mark against the oil industry….but should not be taken as a whole. There are many good companies and good people who do everything the way they’re supposed to in order to give us what we as a nation have asked for. Try not to blame all of us for the results of one. I ask only that the on going efforts to correct this disaster are recognized and that no further lives will be ruined because of it.

I will continue to write about my association with and admiration of the oil industry as thoughts fill my mind or as new information becomes available…. Both from history and the current situation.

Love and Loss

All pictures from the BP website........'© BP p.l.c.

PLEASE READ THE PREVIOUS POST "MY OIL HISTORY" BEFORE CONTINUING WITH THIS POST AND THE FOLLOWING POST

http://www.theoildrum.com

http://www.bp.com

I heard a Mother one time on tv discussing her son. She said that every time she is with a group of other women she listen’s to them talk with great pride about what their children are doing. One just got married, one just got a new job, one going to college, one off to explore the world, etc.….. And there she sits with a child who was just arrested for a drug related crime, in jail with a very bleak future. This latest had come after years of dealing with his addiction problem, bringing on other heart breaking episodes for their whole family. Yet, he is still her son and she still loves him and she knows the good that is located somewhere within him….. He had went from a beautiful, small, wonderful child with a very big productive heart into a self destructing failure at life. The pain was almost more than she could bear…… Furthermore she knows that no one can appreciate, or even begin to sympathize with her sadness.

I guess I compare the BP oil spill to a similar feeling. Through misinformation, conspiracy theorists, rumors, lack of knowledge, the harm already done and the fear of what further damage we’ll have to deal with, not to mention our dependence, very few people understand.

My first thought when this happened was for the families of the eleven who died in the initial rig explosion. Suffice to say my prayers are with them in their grief. The workers gave their lives for something they believed in, worked hard for, and did their job to provide the rest of us comfort. May they forever rest in peace knowing that they are hero’s in my eyes.

My second thought (as with most of the world) was the damage that has already and will come to our beautiful gulf coast…. Needless to say, with the exception of Hiroshima, & Chernobyl, and a few others, it was and will be the most horrifying event in our history, and, as with all great disasters it will not end for a very long time. My prayers are with those whose livelihood depends on what the gulf has given them through generations, and for our planet that will suffer the most.

My third thought is with those who are now faced with untold challenges ahead of stopping the oil flow and cleaning up the enormous mess it has created. It’s going to take greater wisdom and technology than the world has ever seen and countless hours of work involving thousands of people on land, in the sea and on the coastlines affected. (as of now the total scope is unknown and cannot totally be assesed).

I would like to state that I will not be discussing “blame” at this point, that will be left to those who do the investigating in the future and for others to debate to their heart’s content. I will say that any time man is involved in doing any thing, the probability for error is greatly increased if not certain. Oversight, mistakes, human error, equipment failures, etc. are part of life period. In no other area of life or industry can Murphy’s law be applied more honestly “if it can go wrong it will” than in the oilfield.

That being said, I also want to make it clear that I am not an engineer or oil field technician. Therefore, I have a very limited knowledge of what BP is doing when it comes to fixing this huge problem. However; saying that, I want to add that very few do comprehend the complexities of the problem or the fix…. So, you will not read any suggestions coming from me. The public at large, understandably so, does not have a clue, which brings me to my next point.

Frustration, being mad & upset, yelling and screaming, assuming things you know nothing about, and pointing fingers is a normal, expected response, but many of the nonsensical statements I’ve heard over the past month of dealing with this, really needs to stop.

First of all NO ONE WANTED THIS TO HAPPEN! Not the 11 workers, not the other 150 people on that rig at the time, nor the BP officials and crews or any of the other support companies working on this project, wanted this to happen. Furthermore, they along with thousands of others are doing everything in their power to stop it. It very simply is not a simple fix.

There are untold numbers of some of the greatest engineer and scientific minds in the world working on this along with industry personnel physically doing the hands on work, gathered from hundreds of companies from around the world.

I also want to remind my readers that this in no way is written “in defense of the companies involved” but rather “in support of” all the people involved. If you are interested in the technical aspect of all this, I would urge you to spend some time reading on this website. http://www.theoildrum.com/ Also shown at the top of the page. It is updated on a daily basis with interesting articles and comments and you can learn a lot about what is being done. Also, the live feed of operations which can be found at http://www.bp.com also shown at the top of the page, which shows the robots working 5,000 feet below the surface of the water is absolutely awesome. If you can imagine the folks at the controls working 24 hours a day in shifts in order to complete this latest attempt at stopping the gusher, you will soon realize the immense efforts going into it.

My heart is so torn right now. Full of love and admiration of an industry that has been my life and continues to sustain me. Full of sadness and embarrassment for something going terribly wrong and not being able to do anything about it. Just like the Mother at the dinner party discussing her wayward son, I don’t know what to say except it is my heart and soul and I am so awfully sorry for his mistakes. Yes, we did the best we could and yes I have other children who did not turn out this way.

My next post will cover and hopefully dispel some of the idiotic myths and ideas that has hit the “news” over the past month. Believe what you will but the answers to this problem will not come easily.

Please continue to read the following post "Hope"

My Oil History

Raw, tired and torn

I see and understand

The tools of his trade

A pair of greasy hands

Image to the left is of my parents taken in approximately 1937

As the story was told to me…….

My Dad was 19 years old, had just graduated from high school and was working at his Dad’s farm in the field, putting up hay with his team of horses, when he heard some noise…. This was in central Kansas, the year was1929. He looked up in time to see several teams of horses coming down the road and pulling in to their neighbor’s field. There was wagon after wagon hauling huge loads of wood and metal….. Finishing his work that evening, he wandered over to the activity site which was abuzz with men unloading equipment, more wagons coming in and leaving, and a lot of stuff going on that a young farm hand simply didn’t understand. He struck up a conversation with a guy on location consequently to learn that they were building a drilling rig…. The oil field had arrived.

The man said to him, “Wanta job? You’re a young, strapping guy, ever considered working on a rig?” They offered him more money per day than he’d ever heard of, talked it over with his Dad that night at the supper table and grandpa said “if you’ll help out here at home by paying your Mom to do your laundry, pack your lunch, and can get your chores done in the mornings or evenings before you go to the rig site, it would sure help out and add to the income around this place”. With that, my Dad took the job…..Later, he met my Mother and married her in 1935. My sis was born in 1937 and I came along in 1943. Through the ensuing years Dad worked his way up…..from a roughneck to a driller, from a driller to a toolpusher, then was offered a job as a roustabout where he learned the other side of the industry…..then on to production boss, and eventually supervisor, From a rig to a pump jack, he kept men and leases and equipment running smoothly for over 45 years in the industry until his retirement.

When I was eleven months old, in 1943, they were transferred to an oilfield camp in another area, then a few months later to the little lease house on the hill by the creek where I grew up.

Yes, I am oilfield trash through and through. I was born and raised in it, married into it, our son got his petroleum engineering degree in 1981 and it’s still a big part of my life. I have already written some about my experiences with this industry, and there are many more I will write in the future…..

Due to its very nature,, it is a hated industry but in looking beyond it’s first appearance I have always had pride in all it entails. It’s been a battle my entire life and now my beloved industry has yet another black mark. In the post to follow I’ll be discussing its latest relationship with disaster as the story continues.

Please continue on to read “love & loss” and “hope”.

My Grand Canyon~~~~~

I read an article not long ago written by a well known author who often journals about cancer. She had visited the Grand Canyon and also spoke of it’s immense size. Her assessment was to look from where she was standing, across to the other side, ignoring the depth, the steep cliffs, the dangers below and to keep your eye simply on the other side….. NO!

My perception was to search every little tiny crack and crevice below me, the beauty on the floor of the canyon, the twisting rapids of the river, the secrets the Canyon holds and the challenges around and in each grain of rock. The depths of the unknown, the places untouched by humans, the caves of respite, the sun barren mounds of granite exposing their beauty to those who will take notice. The exciting shift of the earth’s crust to form valleys and peaks of grandeur and the ever hidden places of mans mind.

I love the Grand Canyon and it is very special to me because that is where I was when my cancer first struck. From the moment I got so sick and the lymph node swelled to reveal its presence, I knew what it was, cancer had caught me. Even though it was almost two months later before I was ofically diagnosed with non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma I knew then. When I finally approached the edge of the canyon a few days later, the tears begin to release themselves. I knew what was ahead of me and in my weakness I could barely cope at that moment. Yet, there it was………this vast expanse of God’s creation. As I stood there I was overwhelmed at the smallness of myself…… A insignificant particle of human flesh surrounded by so much more that possibly I had been ignoring until then?

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This post is not about the Grand Canyon but it’s about where God chose to put it. Arizona.

I am very mad at the government of Arizona. I would like to go to the Grand Canyon again, but until they change their attitude on freedom and border protection, I will never return.

How can a State that holds so much beauty be so ugly? How can a State declare itself part of the “land of the free”, the United States of America, and yet refuse to share it’s wealth of goodness and productivity or recognize the opportunities for others they have to offer.

They had choices……..All they needed to do was travel to the north part of their State and look at how insignificant they really are in comparison to the full scope of things….. All they needed to do was help fight against the “bad guys” and give shelter to the ones who only wanted a small piece of paradise… freedom in the land of the free, Instead, they are trying to lock their doors and play selfish.

Instead, they have declared war on innocent people because they’re different than what they think they need. They are blaming all of their problems on the wrong people. Instead of saying thank you to the very ones who keep them going with their hard work and desire to better themselves, they are choosing to label and hate and turn away their fellow men…… Instead of opening their hearts to great minds, talented and dedicated people, and probable opportunities for many, they are turning their backs on potential citizens, just because they’re different.

The answers to their problems on the south along the border, lay just to the north of them….. Their own personal message from God laid out in the Canyon for all to see….. The message that says “I am great, I am grand, I am vast, I am beauty, I have all this to offer, explore my lands and become a part of me – a message that is there for all of us to hear.

Arizona has so much more to offer but they are choosing to shut it away…… They are pushing away the very peoples who settled their land. Those who saw the beauty and chose to care for it before the white man came to ruin it. They have decided that different is bad and therefore must be banished. They have become greedy and they have become selfish.

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My Grand Canyon does not hate, my Grand Canyon does not turn man away, my Grand Canyon opens it’s soul to those who needs it and the rest of the world to love it and learn from it. My Grand Canyon says to the world that we have places for you, when you come to us with love in your heart and a willingness to produce, you are free.

I will leave my photos of the Grand Canyon at the top of my blog page because I love it so and it’s a great reminder to me to keep searching for more…… But I will not visit it in person again until the hate that is in our world and most recently evidenced in that particular State goes away….. Until Arizona can find another way to handle their problems instead of spewing hatred, I will visit my Grand Canyon only in my mind and through my memories. My Grand Canyon welcomes you and I invite you to visit it here……in my heart.

Finally Found

Being “lost” is not a fun thing…… It usually creates a sense of panic, and there is an underlying fear that fills every fiber of your being, of ever being able to find your way again. Regardless of which way you turn or what choices you make, you are still left with unfamiliar territory around you. Easily you can forget where your starting point was.

I have been giving a lot of thought recently to what this past few years has been like……. One day I was a healthy, happy, carefree 62 year old person, looking forward to retirement, and the next day I’m not sure what is happening or where I am on my life’s journey or what’s going to happen to me.

That was 4 years ago……48 months of existing but not really living……over 1,400 days of facing one health issue after another… fear springing up on a constant basis to set me back again, obstacle after obstacle that turned me in a different direction, challenges that threatened to stop me completely. Choices that tricked me into taking the wrong turns, underbrush to hide traps and snares, days running into days and nights running into nights with no breaks.

wandering…..worrying….wondering…..waiting…..weakening…... whining…..wearing… wishing…… and woefully willful…..

I say woefully because determination and the will for finding your way is not easy. It would have been so much easier, and maybe better for some had I just been satisfied to stay lost.

After that much time, one forgets who they really are beneath all those problems. What was I like when I was healthy? I can hardly remember! Will I ever be able to find my way again? Where did that person go? Where does she belong and what is her purpose?

The uneasiness and will to continue to search until you can find the right trail to take you home affects a lot of people. Those you call on for help and support and those who are waiting on you and those who are looking for you or helping you look for yourself.

Finally finding the correct trail brings you to yet another beginning.

That is where I honestly feel like I am right now…… After years of fighting the jungle around me, I’ve finally located the trail, I’m back on track now and on my way back home……

My checkup with the heart doctor resulted in a feeling I haven’t experienced in a very long time…… It was the last of my scheduled medical appointments and misery, after 4 long years of looking for a way out. It was the final step in my quest to locate the real her……the person I used to be……

The doctor brought up all of my old records to compare my blood levels over the past 17 months. I do not have the exact numbers in front of me but my triglycerides that were over 500 are now in the very low/normal range. My HDL or bad cholesterol which was almost off the chart are now actually lower than he wants, and my good cholesterol which was next to nothing is now higher than he wants….actually above the normal range…..blood pressure was 138 over 70 and everything else looked good and sounded good. He decreased one of my medications from 1500 mgs to 500 mgs. And he cut another medication dosage in half. He was a very happy doctor and I was a very happy patient. I am to have another blood test and see him again in October, then if everything is still good I won’t have to see him again for a year…..!!!!! YEA!!!!!

As I left his office with a spring in my step, I walked out, looked up to the heavens and said “thank you God”. I looked down and there was the path home stretching out before me. My cancer checkup was good, my back is much better, my spots are almost gone, and my heart is beating with a smile…… I suddenly felt the power today to take control again and had a renewal of what life could be like. There really IS "So Much More".

I can honestly relate to those who have been held captive in foreign prisons, finally being released to freedom. It might be a “while” before I’m completely home again, before I find her heart and soul and energy and self worth that she held so dear 4 years ago, but at least I know she’s on track, I’ve found the right trail, there is no doubt about it, and I’m on my way…….

Just because I’ve finished with all the doctors appointments, surgeries, treatments, and procedures, this isn’t the end……. It’s actually the beginning to the end…… I will maintain the trail ahead and behind me now….. now that I know what I’m looking for and which path to follow…I know I will find her again.

Here’s to getting back on track, taking the right trails, marking where you’ve been and knowing where you’re going……and here’s to good health!

Lemon Juice and a Wire Brush

You’ve heard the saying, a lily-white completion?

The first year I went to school was in 1947, I was 4 years old. After a few weeks, the teacher sent a note home to my parents telling them that “your daughter has dirty elbows!” Now in defense of my mother, I did bathe daily and I was always kept clean and was taught proper hygiene. However; That did not make my elbows any different.

That evening, Mom went out to Dad’s pickup and got his wire rig brush…. It was part of the tool collection he carried with him at all times when working, and was used to scrub down a rusty connection on pipe, or clean a rig floor or pump jack parts that may need shined. She brought it in the house, I was placed up on a stool in front of the kitchen sink and while holding my arms under running water, we scrubbed my elbows with lye soap and the wire brush. Afterwards, she taped lemon slices on my elbows and I slept with them. I also wore the lemon slices on weekends. No, it wasn’t child abuse; it was simply the only way my Mother could think of to make my elbows nicer. This must have went on for several weeks and there may have been a little improvement. As time went on, she and I both became tired of the routine and it was stopped. Inevitably my elbows would turn dark and rough again, and we’d start the process over…. This went on for several years and even as an adult, I have tried it a few times.

My Dad always had a lot of freckles, and some were raised. I once asked him about them and he told me they were “catfish bumps”….. Catfish have spots, but do not have bumps so where he came up with that I will never know, but nevertheless I believed him, and later when my freckles turned into bumps, I just assumed I had the same catfish bumps he did. I will never forget the look on the doctor’s face the first time I went to a dermatologist and when he ask what the concern was with my skin and I told him I had catfish bumps…. This was at age 40. Ok, so I was naïve….. :)

The doctor informed me what I really had was “seborrhea keratosis”. An inherited non cancerous condition that was not serious and nothing to worry about. I was told then to keep an eye on any that may change in appearance or become wart like. I was also lectured about “vanity”. I have never been a vain person so I dismissed all of it from my mind and accepted that I would just live with the condition as I am. This was fine except in the past few years some of them have gotten worse, along with my elbows being dirty looking again, so I made this skin appointment with another dermatologist.

I went through the whole story with him, he examined me all over and again gave me the same diagnosis of seborrhea keratosis. When he looked at my elbows he told me I had psoriasis on them, and had probably always had it, and guess what……that due to medical advances, wire brushes and lemon juice are no longer used as a cure. Ha! We both had a good laugh over that one. He gave me cream to use on them and said they would probably clear up within a few weeks, but in the future if it acted up again just start using the cream again and leave the wire brush in the garage and the lemons in the fridge. Whew!

As far as my “catfish bumps”, he used liquid nitrogen….. He sprayed it on 44 spots on various locations of my body. Lectured me on using sun screen, gave me some salve to use on my face and sent me home. He said from now on to call them “sparkles”…… :)

So I’m a little odd....... but this is the way the good Lord made me. I have catfish bumps….uh….sparkles..... Maybe you have one eyebrow lower than the other one or a crooked toe or a knot on your chin. The point is, as long as it’s not a danger to your health learn to love it and accept it as your own. God gave us our features and they are what makes us who we are. They make us unique, and individuals.

Part of taking care of yourself is accepting those special qualities you cannot change and learning to love every part of you. By the way, the doctor gave me permission to be vain if I wanted, and if another sparkle appears that I cannot live with, just come in and he’ll get rid of it. As for the rest of the brown spots…..well, I yam who I yam……they remind me "I’m me and there is so much more to me"……. :)