The Floodgates

Who opened the flood gates?......Even I am surprised at all of the words coming out of me, but that’s ok. I need to write and that’s what this blog is for.

The scariest time of my heart attack was when I was released from the hospital and started my journey back to regain my health. It didn’t take long to realize that due to the severity of my illness, being kept unconscious for 4 days, and the drugs I had been given, my thought processes had suffered. I simply could not get my mind into gear in order to think. I grabbed my computer and begin to type, and the words that came out were not of my choosing. I was mixed up on many levels. It was almost like someone else had taken over my body and everything was now happening in slow motion.

I might have thought I was competent, but I look back now and see that I wasn’t. When I wrote “hello world”, I was only at the very beginning of my recuperation. I have learned so much more since then.

As you may be able to tell, I feel like I am now honestly coming out of my “fog”. I am beginning to trust myself again as far as what I say and do. I really have been gaining strength on a daily basis, though I now know and accept that I still have a ways to go.

At one point I said that I didin’t want to make this all about my health because there is “so much more” in life, but I’m learning that I have the need to talk about it…so you'll just have to bear with me for awhile, I can not deny it any longer. Yes the floodgates have opened and thank goodness the muddy waters are finding a way out……