As the rest of the world "Resolutes"......

Here I sit.

January 4^th, the first working day of 2010, and what am I doing? Waiting.

Waiting…..aruugh!

Waiting on the phone to ring!

I am totally in limbo……..Since this is the real beginning of my resolution (made last year) to get me healthy, one would think I’d be working at it, but no…… I’m sitting here waiting. While the rest of the world is starting on their new year’s resolutions of getting in better physical condition, and exercising in some form, maybe on their way to the gym, or out for a walk……I’m just sitting here waiting……

After nearly 4 years of “pushing through the pain”, I am convinced that I can’t do it any longer, nor that it did any good when I did make the effort! In all honesty, I think I’ve given up, so I’m just waiting…..

I’m waiting on the phone call from my orthopedic doctor to see if he has received the MRI results, taken on 12/28/09. With the holiday and the U.S. snail mail, I am guessing it may be today before the reports even reach his office. How long it will take him to study the information and develop a plan of action for me, is anyone’s guess. He has my number.

I am convinced that with my past attempts to handle it on my own, I only did more damage to my otherwise unstable back, so I’m not going to do anything else until I hear from him.

So here I sit……..waiting.

There are hundreds of questions running through my mind….. Is my back worse than it was a year ago? I think it is, but the pictures need to confirm that in order to provide the doctor guidance. If it is worse, can he still do the more simple surgery or will it require something more? If it does call for something more complex, how much more? Will my heart withstand what could be ahead? Can the stenosis, disc’s, nerves, etc. be fixed at all? Will I get total relief from the pain or just partial relief?

I cannot demand the doctor to move too quickly, this is my spine we’re talking about and I want him to be sure of what he’s doing. “Hey Doc, take all the time you need, but don’t take too long, ok?”

The sermon in Church yesterday was based around Matthew 6: 25-31 “Do not be anxious about your life.” I do realize that things happen in God’s time, not mine, but that does not make the waiting any easier. I sincerely believe that I have done everything He would have wanted me to do, so now it’s totally is His and the doctor’s hands. I just wish they’d hurry.

And in the mean time, all I can do is wait for their decision……

And Practice Patience.....

And wait.........

With any luck at all, I’ll catch up with the rest of you soon…..